What killed the cat?

A settlement east of Rynmere across a stretch of water called 'the eastern trench' broken into three regions: Welles, Oakleigh, and Berwick.
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Elyna
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Posts: 1190
Joined: Wed Mar 30, 2016 12:31 pm
Race: Mortal Born
Profession: Official Troublemaker
Renown: 231
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What killed the cat?

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Elyna turned back as he called, brow raised in mild surprise. He made his confession and a smile eased across her features, “it sounds like a good idea,” she admitted. He made a joke at her lover’s expense and she rolled her eyes instead of offering reproach. He sounded more considered, less jaded and she found the small spark of hope, blossoming into something stronger.

Malcolm going to be busy that evening and the next day it would be difficult for her to make arrangement. Still, she wanted to help. She pressed fingers to the bridge of her nose as she considered the options. “I would be glad to accompany you, and I think that it would be for the best if I accompanied you. Once I have more details of our next briefing, I’ll contact you, and I’ll request an audience with the Warden so that you can speak with him,” she offered

It was then that she nodded her head to the man, “I hope it goes well with your friend, I’ll contact you when I am able to give you an estimate of time. Good evening, Squire Rathaan,” another cautious smile before she turned and departed. Feet crunching over fresh fallen snow. The same powder that lined her shoulders and settled in her hair. She’d gone a few dozen steps before realising that her scarf was still wrapped around the branch of a tree. The Captain doubled back along the outskirts of the camp to retrieve it. It was wet with melted ice and she grimaced, stuffing it into her pocket instead of wrapping it around her neck. It was then that her stomach overruled any pretence of sense and she went in search of a hot meal.
word count: 296
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What killed the cat?

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Elyna


Points!:

Story: 5/5
Collaboration: 5/ 5
Structure: 5/ 5
Knowledge:

Endurance: Using tricks to keep circulation in the cold.
PC: Squire Rathaan
Squire Rathaan: Lied to you
Squire Rathaan: Trusts the people he came with
Squire Rathaan: Would put his life in the hands of his unit
Squire Rathaan: Can only see the Warden as someone who turned a sparring session into a show.
Squire Rathaan: Could put faith in you
Squire Rathaan: Gives orders to his unit
Squire Rathaan: Is he a natural leader?
Squire Rathaan: Complications at his birth have left him ill
Squire Rathaan: Oldest squire in the history of the Iron Hand?
Squire Rathaan: Father was a captain in the Iron Hand
Squire Rathaan: Would like to go and apologise to the Warden.
Sqiure Rathaan: Needs to speak to a friend before apologising to the Warden
Squire Rathaan: Would like you there when he speaks to the Warden.

Loot:
NA
Fame:
+1 (speaking to Sintih in the first place), +1 (dealing with the situation well)
Devotion:
+5 (create positive change in your community), +2 (reveal a lie)
Magic:
These points may NOT be used for arcana
Sintih


Points!:

Story: 5/5
Collaboration: 5/ 5
Structure: 5/ 5
Knowledge:

Discipline: Hide your facial expressions in careful neutrality.
PC: Captain Elyna Burhan
Captain Burhan: Knows when you lie.
Captain Burhan: Assumes you wanted to show Malcolm as being like everyone else.
Captain Burhan: Feels your actions against Malcolm dishonour you
Captain Burhan: Believes you should have faith in your leader.
Captain Burhan: Follows the hierarchy
Captain Burhan: There's no middle ground in the military
Captain Burhan: Might be worthy of respect after all.
Captain Burhan: Says that the Warden bases all of his decisions on sound tactical and leadership knowledge.
Captain Burhan: Your efforts to bring shame to the Warden show your inexperience and folly
Captain Burhan: Believes that you can not, and do not, understand the burdens of leadership
Captain Burhan: Daughter less than 60 trials old.
Captain Burhan: Thinks you are holding yourself back.
Captain Burhan: Thinks you should detach yourself from your unit.

Loot:
NA
Fame:
NA
Devotion:
NA
Magic:
These points may NOT be used for arcana

Overview:

General comments. Oh, I'm really glad I got to review this thread - it was fascinating to read! I loved it! Expertly written, wonderfully crafted and really emotional.
Story Lovely story which flowed beautifully. It was a cohesive story from beginning to end. Great stuff!
Structure No issues

Please do PM me if you think I've missed anything or you have any questions!
word count: 430
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~~Red in hoof and claw... ~~
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