Sintih
Points!:
Story: 5/5
Collaboration: 5/ 5
Structure: 5/ 5
Knowledge:
Location: Training grounds
Blades: Longsword: Basic Stance
Blades: Longsword: Balancing your movements.
Tactics: Keep your eyes on your opponent
Tactics: The best defence is not to be where your opponent is aiming
Endurance: The pain of sparring
Rupturing: Blinking: The dangers of over stepping
Doran: Cold, hard man
Doran: Hasn't changed
Doran: Critical
Doran: The reason for all your problems
Doran: You tried to kill him
Loot:
Fame:
Devotion:
Magic:
Doran
Points!:
Story: 5/5
Collaboration: 5/ 5
Structure: 5/ 5
Knowledge:
Psychology: Regret weighs heavy
Blades: Longsword: Refined basic stance
Blades: Longsword: Adjusting mid-move for better defence
Blades: Longsword: Parting Strike
Blades: Longsword: Ox Guard
Teaching: Point out the mistakes
Teaching: Prepare them for what you're going to do
Endurance: The pain of sparring
Discipline: Not lashing out when you want to do so
Medicine: Checking for breathing in an unconscious patient.
Sintih: Not very good with a sword
Sintih: Really hasn't changed
Sintih: Blames you for his mother's death
Sintih: Thin and weak
Sintih: Still very prone to weakness.
Loot:
Fame:
Devotion:
Magic:
Overview:
General comments. Oh what an interesting and fun thread to review! I love how the two of you are so very emotional and hateful because of both loving the same woman ~ you weave a very complex story there, because there is also a sense of them being bound to each other somehow. Excellent work, both!
Story Great - interesting, no worries at all.
Structure All good - a couple of minor errors here and there, but nothing worth worrying over. Well done!
Please do PM me if you think I've missed anything or you have any questions!
