Analysis
2nd Vhalar 720 in Volta, Rharne
Meditation had given Yrmellyn insights the other day. Why hadn’t she meditated more? It was a great way to understand things in depth. She had decided to use it systematically from now on. Right now, she strolled around in the port of Volta. For once, she wasn’t going to paint. She had left the easel and the backpack with her painting kit at the tavern she stayed in.
She entered a pier and walked to the end of it. Watching the water and the sky she decided to stop there for a while. She closed her eyes and stood immovable, waiting for the mind to calm down. Thoughts flowed through her and she let them flow without trying to manipulate them.
Don’t look for answers from other people. What other people know is not what you need. Look into yourself and find the answers there. That is what insight is. This is what I must do. Otherwise...
Yrmellyn breathed in the fresh air. The river Zynyx met the ocean here in Volta so the water was bracken. The odour of river mud blended with the fresh scent of salt and the stench of kelp. Yrmellyn smelled all this as one heady mix. She allowed her mutation, the enriched impressions, to play with it. The mutation, a change created in her by her magic, never ceased to intrigue her.
Why did the magic create this in me? For what reason? What is it about? I got a plaything in my mind. It's a kaleidoscope in many dimensions, mixing and remixing everything I experience. It's a constant flow of shifting patterns. I haven’t used it for anything so far. It has used me. It gives me all these colours, sounds and rhythms, smells and tastes, feelings, words and ideas. But why?
The sounds of voices reached her from a distance, workers in the harbour calling out to each other. Was her partner Ha’zel one of them? The thought of him warmed her. He wasn’t her first love but deep down she felt that he was the last one, the one that was forever.
There are also other aspects of attunement I know about but rarely use. I recall what my mentor, Mariuz once told me. There are many abilities a mage of our kind could become able to use if we practice and refine our control of them. But, I wasn’t the kind who liked to practice. I liked to play. I liked pleasures and parties and I loved to immerse myself in art. That was what I desired. It was also what the magic brought me. A built-in toy to dazzle me and amaze me. A never-ending art performance.
Did the magic make me a plaything? In that case, come on, let’s play!
Her eyes still shut, Yrmellyn opened her hearing to all the sounds around her. She listened to them the way you listen to music. No sound was more important than the others. Instead, the total resounded in her like one single tune. She immersed in it until the stream of thoughts stopped and made room for something else in her mind. Attunement. The magic flowed and lived in her. It wanted to spread out, play and dance with her. It wanted to open itself to the environment and experience it.
Omnivision. She knew the name of the phenomenon that began awakening in her but she wasn’t familiar with it. Caution had always made her hold back. Playing with the magic had been out of the question for arcs but she would try this now. Play! For a moment, a faint sense of wonder ran through her at the mere thought. It lit up her mind and made it tremble in excitement and fear. Still, she allowed herself to continue. Her awareness expanded around her entire body. Soon, she felt the magic emanate from her, connect with the world around her and appraise it. As her eyes were closed she didn’t see the surrounds, yet she “saw” them in with another sense, without colours or fine details but possible to understand.
Oh, wasn’t it like an imprisoned being finally breaking free...
No. Control the magic or let it control you. Never let it rule you. Keep to the meditation. Don’t let it sway you.
By an act of discipline and will, Yrmellyn ended the Omnivision. She returned to the normal way of listening in meditation. Will and discipline were the keys. She might play a bit with the attunement but she wouldn't lose herself in it. Instead, she would let her mind deal with other and more serious things. There was a question that gave her no peace. This was what she needed to meditate on, sooner than the fun of magic.
What would happen if I would travel to Viden and search for Rudi and his grandmother and father?
The sounds of the water, the seagulls, the distant voices and her breath served as a mental railing for her mind to hold on to. Yrmellyn kept her hearing open and paid attention to the air going in and out of her lungs. She felt the steady beats of her heart in her chest and the faint sea breeze on her skin. The pier beneath her feet and the total stillness of her body kept her grounded. Without interfering, she allowed her mind to deal with the question she had given it.
It’s a big question. Divide it up in smaller questions to make it easier to explore.
First off, what would I do when arriving there, in a foreign city I never have been to before? How would I know where to go and whom to speak with? Ah. That’s an easier question! I could ask somebody in the harbour for directions. Couldn’t I? Or, if I have the luxury of travelling with Gray Gull I could ask the captain to help me. That is not a bad idea. The captain has been in Viden before. He might be able to guide me. That way I would at least have one reliable acquaintance in Viden as long as the ship will stay there. And I would have Ha’zel of course if he would come with me.
The trail of thought paused there and the meditation steered her into a new route. If this was a sidetrack or not didn’t seem important. It was what it was. It arose and demanded that she must deal with it.
Then again. What if Ha’zel doesn’t want to go to Viden? Would I travel without him?
Instant knowledge filled her. There was only one single answer to that question.
No. Never. I will stick with Ha’zel until the end of my life.
I have already messed up so many things. I have lost Rudi (and Granny Anne and Laurits Verran). It happened because I travelled away alone instead of bringing them with me. Not that it would have been possible to ask them to join me. I didn’t have any money and wasn’t in a position to offer them anything. Nor did I know that Laurits would claim the boy as his son. Or, that Rynmere would sink into an inferno of cruelty, violence, dark magic and plague. It wasn’t possible to predict it. I knew so little...I didn’t know a thing!
The insight about her ignorance and clueless actions might have been hard to bear if she hadn’t been meditating. Now, she saw it like from outside of herself, examined it and accepted it. This was how it had been. More, this was how it still was. She had to admit that to herself.
I know very little about the boy I took on as my apprentice. I know even less about the others. For example, why did Anne keep warning me for Laurits? He was such a nice man and I even daydreamed about us becoming a couple. But, when I told him about Rudi and asked him to take care of the boy while I was away, Laurits he didn’t tell me that I had revealed something of major interest to him. He and Anne both told me their views on this and that. What was true and what was false?
Impossible to know.
They are strangers.
One more insight followed. She had realized that she couldn’t know if anything these people had told her was true. Everything could as well be lies. She didn’t know a thing about any of them.
Were they even in Norr Bay at the time Laurits sent that message by echo scroll? Or were they somewhere else?
What if I would go to Viden (with Ha’zel, never alone) and find myself on a fruitless wild geese chase? It could be a waste of time and money, not to mention putting our lives at risk for nothing. Travelling at sea is never without dangers. Visiting an unfamiliar city always has it’s risks.
Isn’t this what Ha’zel would tell me?
What can I do?
Is there another and better way than a journey to gain information?
Yes. That was what Ha’zel would say. It would be a logical question. She let her mind continue on this track and examine it.
Can I send a letter for example ... the captain of Gray Gull could deliver it (if I pay him) but whom would I write to? The authorities? I don’t know anything about the authorities of Viden or how they work. It might be a big mistake to even ask for the people I’m interested in. It may be an unrealistic dream to find them without problems by sending a letter to recipients I don’t know.
The results of the insights she had gained began coalescing to a total that felt meaningful.
So, what would happen if Ha’zel says no? Then we will not go there. The chance to solve it all by sending letters is so low that it may be non-existent. But, what if I pay somebody else to go to Viden and investigate for me? Who would be able to do it? Again, the captain of Gray Gull comes to mind. But, I know very little about him as well. Would he want to do it and would he have the skills to do it? How much would I have to pay? Would it be better to hire somebody else?
But, I don’t know anybody else who could do the job. Should I ask around in Volta for the right person for the task? In that case, who could I ask? Janey, the tavern maid with the pirate boyfriend? Jack Hector, the creative alchemist doubling as drug peddler? Janey’s boyfriend, with the pirate-y looks?
None of the options feels wise. I need to think more. I need to mull over it and come up with more ideas.
This was the outcome of the mediation. Yrmellyn opened her eyes. She looked at the sea, the river banks, the seagulls in the air, the piers and the ships in the harbour. Then she moved her body and came out of the stillness she had stood in. The meditation was over and she resumed her walk.
She had no solution, only more questions. But she would think, mull over the problem and attempt to come up with more ideas.
She entered a pier and walked to the end of it. Watching the water and the sky she decided to stop there for a while. She closed her eyes and stood immovable, waiting for the mind to calm down. Thoughts flowed through her and she let them flow without trying to manipulate them.
Don’t look for answers from other people. What other people know is not what you need. Look into yourself and find the answers there. That is what insight is. This is what I must do. Otherwise...
Yrmellyn breathed in the fresh air. The river Zynyx met the ocean here in Volta so the water was bracken. The odour of river mud blended with the fresh scent of salt and the stench of kelp. Yrmellyn smelled all this as one heady mix. She allowed her mutation, the enriched impressions, to play with it. The mutation, a change created in her by her magic, never ceased to intrigue her.
Why did the magic create this in me? For what reason? What is it about? I got a plaything in my mind. It's a kaleidoscope in many dimensions, mixing and remixing everything I experience. It's a constant flow of shifting patterns. I haven’t used it for anything so far. It has used me. It gives me all these colours, sounds and rhythms, smells and tastes, feelings, words and ideas. But why?
The sounds of voices reached her from a distance, workers in the harbour calling out to each other. Was her partner Ha’zel one of them? The thought of him warmed her. He wasn’t her first love but deep down she felt that he was the last one, the one that was forever.
There are also other aspects of attunement I know about but rarely use. I recall what my mentor, Mariuz once told me. There are many abilities a mage of our kind could become able to use if we practice and refine our control of them. But, I wasn’t the kind who liked to practice. I liked to play. I liked pleasures and parties and I loved to immerse myself in art. That was what I desired. It was also what the magic brought me. A built-in toy to dazzle me and amaze me. A never-ending art performance.
Did the magic make me a plaything? In that case, come on, let’s play!
Her eyes still shut, Yrmellyn opened her hearing to all the sounds around her. She listened to them the way you listen to music. No sound was more important than the others. Instead, the total resounded in her like one single tune. She immersed in it until the stream of thoughts stopped and made room for something else in her mind. Attunement. The magic flowed and lived in her. It wanted to spread out, play and dance with her. It wanted to open itself to the environment and experience it.
Omnivision. She knew the name of the phenomenon that began awakening in her but she wasn’t familiar with it. Caution had always made her hold back. Playing with the magic had been out of the question for arcs but she would try this now. Play! For a moment, a faint sense of wonder ran through her at the mere thought. It lit up her mind and made it tremble in excitement and fear. Still, she allowed herself to continue. Her awareness expanded around her entire body. Soon, she felt the magic emanate from her, connect with the world around her and appraise it. As her eyes were closed she didn’t see the surrounds, yet she “saw” them in with another sense, without colours or fine details but possible to understand.
Oh, wasn’t it like an imprisoned being finally breaking free...
No. Control the magic or let it control you. Never let it rule you. Keep to the meditation. Don’t let it sway you.
By an act of discipline and will, Yrmellyn ended the Omnivision. She returned to the normal way of listening in meditation. Will and discipline were the keys. She might play a bit with the attunement but she wouldn't lose herself in it. Instead, she would let her mind deal with other and more serious things. There was a question that gave her no peace. This was what she needed to meditate on, sooner than the fun of magic.
What would happen if I would travel to Viden and search for Rudi and his grandmother and father?
The sounds of the water, the seagulls, the distant voices and her breath served as a mental railing for her mind to hold on to. Yrmellyn kept her hearing open and paid attention to the air going in and out of her lungs. She felt the steady beats of her heart in her chest and the faint sea breeze on her skin. The pier beneath her feet and the total stillness of her body kept her grounded. Without interfering, she allowed her mind to deal with the question she had given it.
It’s a big question. Divide it up in smaller questions to make it easier to explore.
First off, what would I do when arriving there, in a foreign city I never have been to before? How would I know where to go and whom to speak with? Ah. That’s an easier question! I could ask somebody in the harbour for directions. Couldn’t I? Or, if I have the luxury of travelling with Gray Gull I could ask the captain to help me. That is not a bad idea. The captain has been in Viden before. He might be able to guide me. That way I would at least have one reliable acquaintance in Viden as long as the ship will stay there. And I would have Ha’zel of course if he would come with me.
The trail of thought paused there and the meditation steered her into a new route. If this was a sidetrack or not didn’t seem important. It was what it was. It arose and demanded that she must deal with it.
Then again. What if Ha’zel doesn’t want to go to Viden? Would I travel without him?
Instant knowledge filled her. There was only one single answer to that question.
No. Never. I will stick with Ha’zel until the end of my life.
I have already messed up so many things. I have lost Rudi (and Granny Anne and Laurits Verran). It happened because I travelled away alone instead of bringing them with me. Not that it would have been possible to ask them to join me. I didn’t have any money and wasn’t in a position to offer them anything. Nor did I know that Laurits would claim the boy as his son. Or, that Rynmere would sink into an inferno of cruelty, violence, dark magic and plague. It wasn’t possible to predict it. I knew so little...I didn’t know a thing!
The insight about her ignorance and clueless actions might have been hard to bear if she hadn’t been meditating. Now, she saw it like from outside of herself, examined it and accepted it. This was how it had been. More, this was how it still was. She had to admit that to herself.
I know very little about the boy I took on as my apprentice. I know even less about the others. For example, why did Anne keep warning me for Laurits? He was such a nice man and I even daydreamed about us becoming a couple. But, when I told him about Rudi and asked him to take care of the boy while I was away, Laurits he didn’t tell me that I had revealed something of major interest to him. He and Anne both told me their views on this and that. What was true and what was false?
Impossible to know.
They are strangers.
One more insight followed. She had realized that she couldn’t know if anything these people had told her was true. Everything could as well be lies. She didn’t know a thing about any of them.
Were they even in Norr Bay at the time Laurits sent that message by echo scroll? Or were they somewhere else?
What if I would go to Viden (with Ha’zel, never alone) and find myself on a fruitless wild geese chase? It could be a waste of time and money, not to mention putting our lives at risk for nothing. Travelling at sea is never without dangers. Visiting an unfamiliar city always has it’s risks.
Isn’t this what Ha’zel would tell me?
What can I do?
Is there another and better way than a journey to gain information?
Yes. That was what Ha’zel would say. It would be a logical question. She let her mind continue on this track and examine it.
Can I send a letter for example ... the captain of Gray Gull could deliver it (if I pay him) but whom would I write to? The authorities? I don’t know anything about the authorities of Viden or how they work. It might be a big mistake to even ask for the people I’m interested in. It may be an unrealistic dream to find them without problems by sending a letter to recipients I don’t know.
The results of the insights she had gained began coalescing to a total that felt meaningful.
So, what would happen if Ha’zel says no? Then we will not go there. The chance to solve it all by sending letters is so low that it may be non-existent. But, what if I pay somebody else to go to Viden and investigate for me? Who would be able to do it? Again, the captain of Gray Gull comes to mind. But, I know very little about him as well. Would he want to do it and would he have the skills to do it? How much would I have to pay? Would it be better to hire somebody else?
But, I don’t know anybody else who could do the job. Should I ask around in Volta for the right person for the task? In that case, who could I ask? Janey, the tavern maid with the pirate boyfriend? Jack Hector, the creative alchemist doubling as drug peddler? Janey’s boyfriend, with the pirate-y looks?
None of the options feels wise. I need to think more. I need to mull over it and come up with more ideas.
This was the outcome of the mediation. Yrmellyn opened her eyes. She looked at the sea, the river banks, the seagulls in the air, the piers and the ships in the harbour. Then she moved her body and came out of the stillness she had stood in. The meditation was over and she resumed her walk.
She had no solution, only more questions. But she would think, mull over the problem and attempt to come up with more ideas.
