Marriage Quick Facts

• Marriage in Yaralon is absolute while those in it are alive. Death, natural or through divorce dueling, is the only way out of marriage.

• Married couples serve as the Crier of their spouse's estate. In the event of one spouse's death, the living spouse is responsible for making the death known. Additionally, the Crier also determines if their spouse's estate is awarded through a Battle Royale, a Tournament, or an Arena Medley.

• While couples determine their own Vows and rules for their own marriage, cheating, betrayal, breaking of trust or Vows, and abandonment, are among the highest desecrations in the eyes of Yari tradition.

• Same-sex marriages, interracial marriages, and polygamy are both accepted in Yaralon.

• Marriages are only accepted by the witnesses if both members are adults of their respective races.

• Any relinquishing of one's weapon is considered acceptance of a proposal for marriage.

• Being unarmed in public is the same as begging to be married by anyone.

• Marriages are performed in the season following the proposal for marriage.

• Private proposals and marriages, meaning without many unbiased witnesses, are not acknowledged under Yari tradition.[/list]

Marriage Overview and Process

Marriage in Yaralon is a sacred tradition, and one steeped heavily in the idea that your spouse is your ultimate partner in combat and life. When all else goes wrong, your spouse stands by you until the end. While foreign marriages are recognized, Yari marriages are always considered to be above them. That said, there is at least enough respect for foreign marriages, that Yari will not usually propose to a married foreigner, if it is known that they are married.

Marriage began among the earliest of the villages in the lands that currently make up the Eternal Empire. These marriages were often heavily steeped in the local religions, often toward the spirits of nature or a common Immortal among the pair. But as these villages were conquered, scattered, many of these traditions were lost. And as the move south led to more death and hardship, soon people found themselves pairing up with the strongest person they could, that also supplemented their own strengths. This was done solely out of necessity, under the premise of only the strongest survive the harsh wilds that make up the modern Yaralon lands.

This is the tradition that survived, marriage by combat, for survival. But small remnants of those earlier religious marriages still linger, more as a flavoring or added uniqueness to a wedding more than any hard and fast tradition. Modern Yari marriage is still held in a high place of honor and respect, but in the last century or so, with the influx of foreigners, some have been using the traditions of marriage in order to take advantage of these foreigners. While this duping earns little respect by the Yari people, it is still accepted as appropriate within the rites of marriage.

In Yari marriages, there is no long courting process, nor dating, at least, in a traditional sense. A proposal offered after one trial of having met is viewed no differently than a proposal offered after ten arcs of friendship. All proposals are to be conducted in roughly the same manner. The person offering the proposal is referred to as 'The Raskal'. This title was borne of the ideas that Raskalarn will come to Yaralon one trial to either destroy the city, be destroyed, or to join together as one dominating force. So one who approaches, is the Raskal. Opposite the Raskal, the person receiving the proposal is 'the Ethel'. This is borne of the idea that the Ethel is already here, and knows themselves best, and just as Ethelynda would, defend themselves from a foreign invader, or welcome them as a friend.

In order to propose, the Raskal asks the Ethel to lay down arms, or disarm, or any other manner of question or suggestion. To be accepted, this must be done publicly, with a fair amount of unbiased witnesses. This is not a hard or fast number, it is simply gut instinct by the culture of what feels right. This proposal question can be given openly or deceitfully, so long as the idea of convincing the Ethel to give up their weapons is conveyed. If the Ethel lays down their weapons, the proposal is considered accepted. Those who witnessed are expected to cheer and congratulate the newly engaged couple. However, no gifts are expected to be given, as this is not the most honorable form of proposal. This method is often viewed as lesser, cowardly, and is often performed upon foreigners who do not understand the Yari customs.

A culturally proper proposal dictates that the Ethel decline the proposal, as no proper Yari man or woman would ever disarm, for any reason. Upon declining, a duel begins. This duel lasts as long as it needs be, and is only considered finished when one of five conditions is met.

• Death of the Raskal - The proposal is declined. The Ethel is viewed honorably, and the Raskal viewed dishonorably.

• Death of the Ethel - The proposal is declined. The Ethel is viewed honorably, and the Raskal viewed dishonorably.

• Unconsciousness of the Ethel - The proposal is accepted. The Ethel is viewed dishonorably, and the Raskal viewed dishonorably.

• Yield of the Ethel - The proposal is accepted. The Ethel is viewed dishonorably, and the Raskal viewed dishonorably.

• Draw - The proposal is accepted. The Ethel is viewed honorably, and the Raskal viewed honorably.

The Draw is often done when both combatants are at crossed weapons and cannot gain an advantage over one another. They give each other some sort of agreement, verbal or otherwise, to both sheathe their weapons simultaneously. Upon doing so, the dual is considered a draw.

Once a proposal has been accepted, the wedding must occur within the following wet or dry season, whichever is opposite the current wet or dry season, in order to be viewed favorably. The wedding itself can be small or large, ornate or not, but must be a public affair. Secretive or hidden weddings are not acknowledged or accepted in Yari culture. Prior to the wedding, the couple will agree upon Vows. These Vows are absolute between the couple. To break one of these Vows is to warrant a Divorce Duel from the other spouse, which would be viewed by the public as honorable on the part of the slighted spouse. These Vows, either by word or by representative symbol will be etched into the spouses' primary weapons. If this etching, or other similar craft method, is performed by an Aevan, or an artisan who has a masterpiece hanging within the Temple to Aeva, it is lauded by the public, and often inspires jealousy in other couples.

Both members of the engaged couple are expected to invite whoever they so choose, and to do so separately of the other spouse. There is no shame or additional honor for having more, less, or an equal number of standard guests at a wedding. However, when it comes to bridesguard and/or groomsguard the public opinion is a lot more finicky. If the couple has a lopsided amount of oathguards, the combined term for bridesguard and groomsguard, it is often viewed that one member of the couple is not pulling their weight. This leads to rumors of weakness, reliance on another person, gold digging, etc. If the couple has too many oathguards, it is often assumed that they are weak, or cowardly, unable to fight their own battles together. Whereas if they have too few or no oathguards at all, it is viewed as foolish, reckless, and antisocial. There is no right or wrong number, it is often based on the reputation the couple has within the city. If they have a high number of enemies, it is acceptable to have more oathguards. If they aren't well known at all, fewer oathguards is acceptable.

The Wedding Ceremony begins at a location of the couple's choosing, with the oathguards standing by the entryway. Decoration is allowable, but not necessary, and too much adornment can be seen as wasteful or silly. As the guests arrive, they are expected to show all weapons they bring to the ceremony, though are not expected to relinquish them. Any gifts brought at this time are given to the oathguards as well. There is to be no drinking or eating during this stage of the ceremony. Seats may be provided, but are not required, and many prefer just an open space for the family, friends, and others to mingle as they wish. Once the guests have finished arriving, a Vowbinder enters the space. This person can be, but does not have to be, a representative from a temple, a superior officer within a mercenary company, a senior craftsman. Typically it can be anyone who isn't related by blood or marriage to the couple, but is important to them both.

The Vowbinder picks a location within the space to hold the ceremony, often the most defensible position. Once the location is picked, the Oathguards take up their positions, with those representing the Raskal on the Vowbinder's left, and those representing the Ethel on the Vowbinder's right. Once in position, the engaged couple, who had been spending this time together in an undisclosed location, arrive together. There is no specific garb or dress that is more or less acceptable, however, both must be openly wearing any and all weapons on their person. They walk together toward the Vowbinder, stoic in face and stop before the Oathguards. The Vowbinder asks those in attendance for any objectors to the marriage to come forth. Upon finishing his question, all Oathguards are expected to draw their weapons simultaneously. Any objectors must first fight through the entirety of the Oathguard, killing them all, before they are allowed to voice their objections to the couple. The couple then decide if the objections hold merit, and if so, honor the objection in whatever way fits. But if they disagree with the objection, then the couple are honor bound to slay the objector. If either of the couple die, the wedding is over, and the marriage nulled.

If there are no objectors, or the objectors have been killed, the ceremony continues. The Vowbinder asks the couple to exchange arms, the very same arms they etched their Vows into. The couple accepts, and does so, and the Wedding Dance begins. The Wedding Dance is the spectacle of the entire ceremony. It is a duel of dance and combat. Elegance is just as important as strength, and skill more important still. The dance is meant to showcase the couple's individual abilities, as well as their combined strengths. If it is seen that one side is vastly overpowering the other, or one is holding back, it can bring great shame to the couple forever. The couple is meant to push each other during this duel, to make the other stronger within it. And much like the proposal dual, can end in the same five ways. Should it end in a draw though, the couple shares a kiss in that moment and returns their partners weapons, and are now married. Also, should either of the couples' Vowed Weapons break during this dance, it is considered a most ill omen. In that moment, the marriage is off, the wedding immediately ceases, and the couple are to never be together again. Unarmed combat is not acceptable by the culture for this duel, often said that it should be "left in the bedroom."

Immediately following this is a 10-trial party, during which family and friends are expected to keep the peace, which by Yari definition simply means no deaths. Any disputes that crop up during this time are either expected to be held until after the wedding party, or are to be settled by non-lethal means. Any deaths during this time brings dishonor on all attendees, but doubly so for the Oathguards. During this party, gifts are given to the couple, with weapons, armor, food, and animals being the most appropriate and appreciated. Family is expected to give one gift per trial, keeping the most useful gift for last. Food and drink for this party is not to be provided by the married couple, but by the friends and family in the form of a long, continuous potluck. Eating or drinking without having brought anything is considered poor taste.

Divorce Overview and Process

Divorce is always allowable, but not always an acceptable practice in Yaralon. For a Divorce to be acceptable, one member of the married couple must have broken one of the Vows they agreed upon. If that is the case, the slighted partner demands their spouse give up their Vowed Weapon. Giving up the vowed weapon constitutes an accepted divorce, but in doing so, the spouse without their vowed weapon becomes a Banished, as publicly declared by the slighted spouse. A Banished is driven from town by all who witness the Banishing. They are chased and attacked and driven to one of the four city gates, where they will be stopped by the gate guards. The guards are expected to ask the individual why they are being chased. If they answer honorably, admitting to becoming a Banished, the guards will then brand their face as all Banished are, strip them of all belongings, and cast them out into the wilderness, never to return. To return, invites immediate death by any and all Yari. If the Banished does not answer honorably, does not admit to becoming a Banished, and any member of the Banishing mob declares them as Banished, the guards are expected to slay the individual.

If the offending spouse refuses to give up their Vowed Weapon, as demanded by the slighted spouse, the divorce duel begins. This duel only ends in death. If the offending spouse survives, they are still viewed with dishonor. If the slighted spouse survives, they are viewed with honor.

Divorce without a broken Vow is less common, as it follows the same protocol as the Broken Vow divorce, but no matter how it ends, both parties are viewed dishonorably.